PattyCake
Across the sea in the Southern Isles,
The Westergaards live in exile,
Our fall from grace was a long way down,
So to make my mark,
I would need a crown,
I was 13th in line, so I had no shot,
But a princess bride,
Now there's a thought,
I had one chance,
I knew I couldn't fail,
So I set my sight on Arendelle,
Their queen to be was “Meh” and cold，
But her younger sister was cute,
Sold!
We met, we clicked, we sang and danced,
Then I thought, “Hey Hans, now here's your chance”，
I popped the question and she said yes,
But now here's the part where it becomes a mess,
Our wedding date was set,
But then my bride takes off,
And when she comes back says, “Meet Kristoff!”，
She'd changed her mind although god knows why,
And I thought there goes my alibi,
Who dumps a prince?
Sure, I'm insincere,
But for some random guy who talks to reindeer?
Can't you hear my heart plea,
She can't see what we see,
It wasn't meant to be,
Maybe now he'll choose me,
No, me!
After all you've been through,
She doesn't deserve you,
One thing that I know is true,
It's not me, it's you,
Ha!
I mean did she think she was gonna do better than a prince?
Well, mother says it's a sign of poor breeding,
When someone chooses a peasant,
Over someone with grace and poise.
Yeah, which explains why no one wants you!
You're just jealous,
Am not!
Are too!
Ladies, ladies, stop bickering,
and pay attention to more important things.
Like me.
In a quiet little village in the south of France,
I could make girls melt,
With a passing glance,
I had trophies on the wall,
From the wars I won,
And the windows afterwards,
Mhh, that was fun,
Everything was perfect in my perfect life,
But there was something missing,
And that was a wife,
She'd cook, she'd clean,
Be with the kids all day,
Then she'd call me perfect and do anything I say,
There was only one choice for my wife to be,
She was gorgeous and everyone in town agreed,
The only girl who didn't throw herself at me,
What would you call that?
Dignity!
I said, “Belle, good news! You're gonna be my bride，
It's your lucky day,
But there's one downside,
The entire town thinks your weird and strange,
But I've got it!
All you have to do is change,
Everything about yourself,
Then the town won't talk,
‘Cause right now your friends are a candle and a clock”，
She turned me down ‘cause she disagreed，
Then she threw me out,
And said she'd rather read,
Can't you hear my heart plea,
She can't see what we see,
It wasn't meant to be,
Maybe now he'll choose me,
No, me!
After all you've been through,
She doesn't deserve you,
One thing that I know is true,
It's not me, it's you,
She sounds like a monster.
Ha! The monster is who she left me for.
And you don't fall in love with monsters, you kill them!
Yeah!
So I got every villager with a torch and pitchfork,
To save her!
Yeah!
Which makes me a hero!
I'm still the most admired man in the village.
No! In all of France!
Yeah!
Women certainly do have a strange way,
Of showing their appreciation for their true heroes.
Yeah.
I always thought it best,
when I've had a choice,
that a women should be silent,
and have no voice,
when a maiden with a mind,
meets a man with power,
she must know her place,
or it all goes sour,
As man of wealth,
Influence,
Prestige,
Are we not all fine specimens,
Indeed!
The think that love is blind,
And it can't be thought,
Yes, but that's a lesson,
And it can be taught,
Yeah, listen to the man and ignore the wife,
That's the only way for a happy life,
The choice is simple,
Choose me and thrive,
Or have it your way,
And be burned alive,
Well, well.
What have we here?
A gathering of men blaming a woman for all their woes.
How...innovative.
Once upon a time, a familiar story,
A desperate king needed fame and glory,
Had to be the hero for the world to see,
He may have fooled everyone,
But he didn't fool me,
No one ever asked how he got that crown,
Of the woman by his side,
As he pushed her down,
He would have to pay for his behavior,
A baby gift with a little flavor,
The difference between you and me,
Is now I'm living happily,
I can't say I'm sorry,
It just wasn't meant be,
Choose me!
After all we've been through,
We can see a new view,
One thing now we know is true,
It's not me, it's not me,
It's,
How can it be me if the problem's,
You!